6G blog updated

i updated the 6G blog. so i guess u guys can read it there, and catch up with each other. i left contact details too. so, link it up =)

since, i have been thinking. i wasnt much of a popular person back then. in fact, i guess i was quite despised since i always took the last place in class, to be surrounded and ignored by girls, to be the butt of the guy's jokes, to be the one who has fight with teachers, a visit to staff room every day and to the principal's once every week, why is it that i have become someone i am today? seriously i cant believe that my life had took such a drastic change. i had one of the loudest voice ( as in voice most heard ) alongside with joshua and weekiat, both the known 'class clowns' a.k.a. popular people back then. it made me wonder, to ponder along my life; when did such a change happen?

people used to remind me back in high school that i'm such a jerk in primary. this guy mentioned that there was once which i actually screwed him all over when he accidently knocked me. ouch. and there was kah wai and cheng lock which gb'ed me with tickles and i broke his specs becoz of that. and even in form one, i guess, i wasnt as such a person i am today. sometimes i wonder, what changed me?

this gathering brought me back down the vista of years ( quoting 'piano' by whichever shit poet in form 5 ) till i see, a child sitting under the piano, in the boom of tingling strings.. whoops where did i go xD oh yeah.. what changed me? i really would love anyone of you, to actually tell me without even a single bit of lie, what u guys actually think of me back then, and now. afterall, i dont think i am one of the popular guys in college now anyway, but i guess i am much better than who i used to be. lets see, the prefarable judges Would be ccm, since u shared like primary and secondary with me =) Cheng Lock since we were once almost mortal enemies, Yoong Kit since i cannot understand why u actually bother to ask who organised this gathering, and i guess, kai wei, since u have been my best friend for the past 4 years ( or was it 3? ) and of coz, wei keat since u have been my punching bad ever since standard 3 hahaha. oh wait.. i shud call u PCK since we are supposed to think of primary schooltime ( or did people call u ANDY eh ? xD )

I guess my change occured when i was in form 3. due to a heck lot of reasons. I started basketball. I started to grow tall, implying gaining confidence. I was first introduced to 'love' by 'all of u guys know who i am talking about'. I joined xue ji. Or was it form 4? I started to know that love comes with responsibility. Understood responsibility when i organised camps. Had my first actual bunch of friends. Betrayal. Had my first, and only girlfriend. Etc etc.

Either way, i sincerely hope that i am very much a better person now. I might not be close to anyone in college, but i hope that i can find a friend; some time soon. I really want to be something to someone, and i am trying, whether u notice it or not. but yet again, i guess i cant be.

my drives these days are like :
Life through the day with a smile. dont waste it coz u never know whether there's a tomorrow.
Is this a worthy decision?
Study for tomorrow's exam.

i hardly know whats with me anymore. i may have wrote that i am refocusing previously, but am i really? that girl, although i like her, but as miss caroline says, we are so much different in the fundamentals. thus i really doubt it'll work out. to be quite different in humour, different levels of language profficiency, different views points. besides, she lives miles away. meeting her would be really hard until and unless she starts to loosen the bonds between the secondary schoolmates, which is to graduate, which only only happen after i leave malaysia. so whats the point? i did not say that i will stop liking her, but i will not take any action to go after her. oh btw, she's really pretty =) in a cutey kind of way haaha

i miss her, her, her, and her. ( 4 different people ) first is a friend, a.k.a. my couple friend but not girlfriend, which does not make any sense =). second is HER, third person is a primary friend. and the last one is someone i used to like =(

sigh. i am here typing for half an hour already. recalling so many memories. and i just realised, my arm is aching again. guess i'll see u guys soon.

-Whispering...